yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I still have a little drunk in my system
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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