I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
