how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
