so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
