He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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