I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
