So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
