Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
