Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
