After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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