Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize