She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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