im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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