is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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