This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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