I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
