Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize