Umm I'm too high to move.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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