goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
