I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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