Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
