Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize