dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I love you. Go after that dick
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize