I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
