i don't like sucking hair
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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