he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
