I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
