hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
