its not stalking. its research.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
