I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
