it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
