Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
