Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
