He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
