We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize