Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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