Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Randomize
