I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
