sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
