but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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