Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
