Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
