Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
