and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize