If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
