i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Farmville is her only friend.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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