I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize