Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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