Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
