so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
