It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
