Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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